LightHouse Counselling and Wellness

At the heart of everything we do is care – for our clients, for each other, and for our community. It’s what makes the world a little brighter, and every bit of kindness matters. This December, we invite you to join us in spreading some holiday cheer through our Food Drive at the Kanata clinic! 🌟 We’ll be collecting non-perishable food items throughout the month to support local charities that provide for those in need. Even a small contribution can make a big impact. It’s a simple but meaningful way to practice gratitude, kindness, and connection this season. 💙 Please drop off your donations at the clinic and join us in sharing warmth and compassion with those who need it most. Thank you for being part of our caring community – together, we can make a difference. 🙏 #HolidayFoodDrive #CommunitySupport #SpreadTheLove

We’re #hiring a new Registered Psychotherapists and Social Workers in Kanata, Ontario. Apply today or share this post with your network.

Have you ever found yourself saying 'yes' when you really wanted to say 'no'? It’s not because you’re trying to make everyone happy—it’s because the thought of disappointing someone feels unbearable. People pleasing often comes from a fear of shame, not a need to please. It’s okay to set boundaries—you deserve to prioritize yourself, too. Xo

As I dropped my son off at school this morning, I noticed something that stayed with me. A group of kids walked by, split into smaller cliques—laughing, chatting, having a great time together. But among them, one girl walked alone, her head down, with no group to join. Every now and again, she would look up at the people around her, but would quickly look down again, discretely and without drawing any attention to her. My heart ached for her. If only someone noticed… If only someone invited her to walk alongside them. It would be such a small gesture, but it could mean the world to her. Loneliness, anxiety, and depression among teens are more prevalent than ever, and it’s a heavy reality that so many young people feel disconnected and isolated. Supporting mental health and building a true sense of community is not just the responsibility of one person; it’s on all of us. Parents, teachers, and community members—let’s make it a priority to talk with our kids and teens about the importance of kindness, inclusion, and belonging. Every gesture of connection, every moment of kindness, can make a difference in someone’s life. Everyone deserves to feel seen, to know they belong, especially in a place they’re expected to attend for years. We can—and should—do better. Let’s strive to make our schools a place where everyone feels connected and like they belong. It starts with a simple invitation, a warm gesture, and a willingness to see each other.

🤍 "It’s okay to feel exhausted. You’re not alone." 🤍 Parenting a teen can feel isolating, especially when every conversation seems to end in an argument or silence. But you are not alone. Every parent struggles with moments of uncertainty, doubt, and exhaustion. Remember: You’re doing important work. Your love matters, even when it’s hard to see in the moment. Even when it feels like they’re pulling away, your presence is still shaping them. If you feel overwhelmed, reach out for support. Parenting isn’t meant to be done alone. Find other parents, a therapist, or a group where you can share your worries and joys. It takes a village—and you deserve care, too. www.lighthousecw.ca

💡 "Sometimes help looks like letting them figure it out." 💡 When your teen is struggling, every bit of you wants to step in and fix things. But often, the most helpful thing we can do is step back and give them space to learn and grow. - Ask: "Do you want advice, or do you just need me to listen?" - Let them take the lead, even if they stumble. "You’ve got this. I believe in you." - Be a safety net, not a parachute. They need to know you’re there, even as they try to fly on their own. It’s okay to feel scared watching them navigate new territory. But trust that the roots you’ve nurtured will guide them, even when they’re out of sight.

🫂 "The goal isn’t perfection—it’s presence." 🫂 Parenting teens is hard. There will be moments you second-guess yourself. Did I say the wrong thing? Was I too hard on them? Should I have let that slide? Breathe. The heart of parenting is connection over perfection. You don’t need to get it right every time. Your teen doesn’t need you to be flawless—they need you to be real. To admit when you make mistakes. To repair when things go sideways. Say: - "I was frustrated earlier, and I didn’t mean to snap. Can we start over?" - "I wish I had listened better when you tried to tell me that. I’m here now if you want to talk." Every moment of repair teaches them it’s okay to mess up—and how to make things right again. Your presence is the greatest gift you can give.

💪 "I say no because I love you." 💪 Teens push boundaries—it’s part of how they learn. Dr. Gordon Neufeld emphasizes that children need structure to feel safe, even if they push back against it. It can feel like every limit you set turns into an argument, but your boundaries are necessary. They say: "I care enough to guide you, even when you don't like it." Here’s the trick: hold the limit AND hold the relationship. - "I know you’re upset, but no, you can’t go out tonight. We’ll figure out another time." - "I get that curfews are frustrating, but being home at 10 keeps you safe." They may be frustrated with your "no," but what matters is that you’re still emotionally available through their big feelings. Boundaries + connection = security.

🎢 "I love you through the highs and lows." 🎢 Some days, your teen is full of joy and laughter—other days, every word feels sharp and heavy. Always remember, these outbursts aren’t personal attacks but signs of inner struggles they’re still learning to manage. Adolescence is full of big emotions, and teens don’t always know how to express them. It’s not about "fixing" their behaviour but understanding what’s underneath—fear, confusion, stress, or even overwhelm from fitting into their social world. Your job isn’t to stop the storm but to be the calm within it. - Name what you see: “It seems like you’re frustrated. Do you want to talk or just sit quietly?” - Stay regulated yourself. When you stay calm, they learn it’s safe to feel their emotions, even the hard ones. Your love creates a place where they can express all their parts—the good, the messy, and the complicated—without fear of rejection.

It’s natural to feel hurt when your once-attached child now seems distant. Suddenly, their world revolves around friends, screens, and activities—and you’re left wondering where you fit in. But this drift is not personal. Teens are biologically wired to shift their attachment focus outward—it’s part of how they learn independence. Dr. Jean Clinton reminds us that even though peers take on a new role, the parent-child connection remains essential. Your teen still needs you, just differently. Instead of pulling them back, walk beside them as they explore. Ask questions about their world with genuine curiosity, without judgment. Be the calm, safe place they return to when life gets overwhelming. Even as they grow away from you, they still need to know you’re steady in your love.