What do you do when a negotiation reaches an impasse?

Navigating conflicting interests, differing values, or emotional elements requires not only intellect, but a good dose of empathy. To overcome these challenges, you can tailor your approach based on the root cause of the issue. If the cause is a feeling of threat or disrespect, work to rebuild rapport and empathy by relating the challenges and pressures you are receiving from your own side. Misunderstandings or lack of information calls for clarity and providing examples or shared experiences. The key is to dissect the situation without seeking to justify your view, or to dismiss your counterpart's positions without seeking to understand them or giving them the opportunity to be heard.

Frustration is the very first stray bullet coming from all directions but one must remain patient and strategize an approach that may best fit the situation. There are several strategies one can employ to try to overcome the impasse and move forward. One very practical strategy is to step away from the negotiation for a few minutes to clear the air and allow everyone to regain perspective. Try to analyze the impasse by accounting for the cause or all causes. Try to understand what is hindering the progress. Keep in mind that by fostering open and constrictive communication impasse level reduces and parties on both side of the aisle feel more comfortable to carry on. FOCUS ON THE NEGOTIATION AND MATERIAL FACTS AND NOT THE PERSON!

Why not look the other way around, instead of looking down at the root cause, why not looking one dimension up and looking for what connects them to form a system, what they may align with? Is there a higher common goal we might collaborate around? Systems thinking may bring insightful practices to deal with conflict and impasse. Create movement, get the beat and dance with systems, as Donella Meadows used to say.

Good negotiations come from a deep understanding of all the ways both negotiating partners recognize value — even beyond the normal scope of value exchange in your market. With that understanding, robust creativity can generate ways to expand the available value to both negotiators. In addition, quantify and agree on the underlying value available to both parties. In many instances, fundamental differences in how value is understood between the parties can reveal opportunities for clarification and movement in the negotiation. With both parties pursuing “win-win” negotiations and openly sharing a broad range of value opportunities, greater value can often be accessed for both sides to readily break an impasse to everyone’s satisfaction.

An important aspect to point out throughout the negotiation is that both parties have a common goal of reaching an agreement to continue doing business together, otherwise they wouldn’t be there. That being in the centre of the conversation helps both parties be more flexible to make concessions focused on the final objective.

When it comes to negotiations, there are moments where escalation is necessary. I always ask my team to escalate the negotiation to me to brainstorm and adjust our position to reach a favorable outcome, even in the face of a stalemate. When your direct reports escalate the negotiation at your level, avoid making the mistake of talking to your subordinate counterpart. Talk only to your direct counterpart at the other company. So if you are a vice president, do not lose time talking to a director of the other company; go straight to their vice president. If your counterpart does not show up, do not even enter into the negotiation. That is when it is better to walk away from the talks!

When I worked in search, there were many times HR recruiters delivered ultimatums because they didn't want to bother or had a different agenda. Typically, I would involve the hiring manager and ask if this hard-nosed position came from them and, if it did, shifted my negotiation to them. If it hadn't, often I persuaded them to intervene to get the real decisionmaker into the process and encourage more flexibility with the compensation,

Great to bring in someone who has the skill to allow listening to take place! Someone who asks: what do we want to conserve moving forward? Systems thinking in practice can be of huge help. Look for more insights from the late Chilean biologist and systems thinker Humberto Maturana.

During my career, I found myself in an impasse in some negotiations. Sometimes you reach a point where neither you nor your counterpart can make any additional concession. At that point, what benefited me was to take a pause and reassess the situation and the alternatives. Sometimes it is better to back away from a lousy deal instead of accepting a compromise that does not convince you. That is also an excellent strategy to bring your counterpart to the negotiating table again, but that works if you have a credible alternative that you can pursue.

In systems thinking we usually say: "hold judgement". Are you really able to observe without immediately jumping to conclusions, really see the other as equal, listen to what is being said beyond words, capture the languaging, see emergence and look for synergies so you may reach some level of coherence?

One thing I’ve found helpful is to take a break after an agreement on a topic (even a small concession on your side) has been made. This will leave the other party feeling they have won something and it will open a more positive path of communication for the next stage of the negotiation.

Approaching this from a job offer perspective, the threat of walking away is a job hunter's most important leverage. If an employer threatens to rescind an offer, they were never really into you and they are exerting power and control and you should walk away, telling them why you are doing it. Keep interviewing during a time when you are negotiating. You may not get what you want in the negotiation and then will have to start over if you reach an impasse. In a job offer situation, get advice from trusted people or negotiation experts. They negotiate frequently. You don't. You are out of your depth.

There are certainly instances where, in the best interest of both parties and for future opportunities, that you walk away from the situation. The most important thing is to make sure that you leave with a positive energy level for both parties and always leave the door open for future discussions.

In systems thinking we usually apply the analogy of the iceberg. What you see is above the surface of the water. If you really want to change a situation, look underneath. If you are able to see what pattern caused that event to happen, you may be able to anticipate what is coming, but if you really what to promote positive change, look for the structure that caused that pattern to be formed, and better yet, look for the mental models that influenced that structure to be formed. What are the worldviews, beliefs and values informing decision?

No matter how it turned out it is beneficial to reflect on your negotiation - to better understand what went well and what you could have done to improve the outcome. How could you had added value to the deal for both parties? Maybe that would have been the key to greater success or simply to avoid an impasse. Share your retrospective insight with your team and colleagues so all can improve as we move into other negotiations.

There is always some learning to take away. An experienced leader may be quicker in seeing opportunities to apply the learnings right away. How are you dealing with uncertainty and frustration? Are you able to turn obstacles into resources?

Earlier in my career, it felt counter-intuitive to pivot away from my initial impressions and positions. It was akin to weakness or having prepared less than ideally. However, with the passage of time and experience, I view adjustments in my stances as a sign that I have been keenly listening and reflecting on what the other side is sharing. New facts, new interests, and perspectives that were not top of mind are all good reasons to adjust one's position and potentially unblock a negotiation.

Throughout my career, I have gained extensive experience in negotiating deals and have developed a variety of strategies to use in any new negotiation. In my opinion, the best way to become a skilled negotiator is through hands-on experience rather than just studying textbooks. It's important to draw from past successful deals and find similarities with your current negotiation to learn and improve. It's worth considering whether your counterpart can offer productivity discounts. If not, you could suggest a bonus tied to volumes. Similarly, if a supplier is not able to offer increased payment terms, proposing a factoring program might be a viable alternative.

In negotiations, it is crucial to avoid making ultimatums or threats when an impasse is reached. Issuing ultimatums, such as rigid demands or non-negotiable positions, can create an atmosphere of confrontation and hinder the possibility of reaching a mutually beneficial resolution. Threats, whether veiled or explicit, can escalate tensions and damage the trust between the parties involved. Instead, it is important to foster an environment of collaboration and open communication. By focusing on constructive dialogue, actively listening to the concerns of the other party, and seeking compromises, it becomes more likely to find common ground and explore creative solutions that address the interests of both sides.