What are some of the common pitfalls and mistakes to avoid when giving feedback and coaching?

Feedback and coaching are essential skills for anyone who wants to help others improve their performance, learn new skills, or achieve their goals. However, giving feedback and coaching can also be challenging, especially if you want to avoid some of the common pitfalls and mistakes that can undermine your message, damage your relationship, or demotivate your coachee. In this article, you will learn about some of the most common pitfalls and mistakes to avoid when giving feedback and coaching, and how to overcome them with effective communication strategies.

1 Pitfall 1: Not clarifying the purpose and expectations

One of the first mistakes that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not clarifying the purpose and expectations of the conversation. Without a clear purpose and expectations, you and your coachee may have different assumptions, goals, or perspectives, which can lead to confusion, frustration, or conflict. To avoid this pitfall, you should always start by explaining why you are giving feedback or coaching, what you hope to achieve, and what you expect from your coachee. This will help you establish a common ground, align your objectives, and create a positive and constructive tone.

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Arturo Mauricio-Gonzalez

Client Relationship Manager + PR & Marketing Communications + Interpersonal Communication +
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Feedback that lacks specifics can be unhelpful and difficult to act upon. Instead of saying, "You need to improve your communication skills," provide specific examples where their communication fell short and offer suggestions for improvement. But the most important mistake you can make is give unsolicited advice.

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2 Pitfall 2: Not listening actively and empathetically

Another common mistake that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not listening actively and empathetically to your coachee. Listening is not just about hearing what your coachee says, but also about understanding their feelings, needs, and perspectives. If you do not listen actively and empathetically, you may miss important information, misunderstand their situation, or come across as insensitive, judgmental, or dismissive. To avoid this pitfall, you should use active listening skills, such as paraphrasing, summarizing, asking open-ended questions, and expressing empathy. This will help you show respect, build rapport, and gain insight into your coachee's challenges and strengths.

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Michael Jaring

Experienced Licensed Practical Nurse | Open to New Opportunities in Healthcare Management, Mental Health, Coaching, Client Care
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An example ive seen or experienced is that people think they have to solve your problem putting their own personal intake on the things that you are having trouble to understand. They think that because it worker for them, it will work for you too. Now theres nothing wrong with that if the person is asking specifically on how they did it but when someone reached out to you and wanted to talk, it means they wanted to be heard and feels validated. We can start paraphrasing and guiding them to find solutions based on their own statement. We always have the answers but sometimes we just need some reinforcement

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3 Pitfall 3: Not giving specific and balanced feedback

A third common mistake that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not giving specific and balanced feedback. Feedback is not just about telling your coachee what they did wrong or right, but also about giving them concrete examples, suggestions, and praise. If you do not give specific and balanced feedback, you may leave your coachee confused, defensive, or discouraged. To avoid this pitfall, you should use the SBI model, which stands for Situation, Behavior, and Impact. This model helps you give feedback that is specific, factual, and focused on the behavior and its consequences, rather than on the person and their intentions. You should also balance your feedback by highlighting both the positive and the negative aspects of your coachee's performance, and by using a ratio of at least three positive to one negative comments.

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4 Pitfall 4: Not involving your coachee in the solution

A fourth common mistake that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not involving your coachee in the solution. Coaching is not about telling your coachee what to do or how to do it, but about helping them discover their own potential and solutions. If you do not involve your coachee in the solution, you may undermine their autonomy, motivation, or confidence. To avoid this pitfall, you should use a coaching approach, such as the GROW model, which stands for Goal, Reality, Options, and Way forward. This model helps you guide your coachee through a structured process of setting a SMART goal, assessing the current reality, exploring various options, and committing to a specific action plan. By involving your coachee in the solution, you will empower them to take ownership, responsibility, and accountability for their own improvement.

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5 Pitfall 5: Not following up and providing support

A fifth common mistake that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not following up and providing support. Feedback and coaching are not one-time events, but ongoing processes that require continuous monitoring, evaluation, and reinforcement. If you do not follow up and provide support, you may lose track of your coachee's progress, miss opportunities to acknowledge their achievements, or fail to address any challenges or obstacles that they may face. To avoid this pitfall, you should always agree on a follow-up plan with your coachee, which includes setting a date and time for the next session, defining the criteria and methods for measuring the results, and identifying the resources and support that they may need. You should also check in regularly with your coachee, provide feedback on their performance, celebrate their successes, and offer guidance or assistance if needed.

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Jamie Hill-Borton

Communications Specialist at VetGo | Crisis Responder | Psychological Health & Safety Professional
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Great points! Follow-up is so important. Another point to add here could be not following up in a timely manner. It is important to follow-up in a timely way - especially when addressing concerns - opposed to following up several weeks later.

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6 Pitfall 6: Not seeking feedback and coaching yourself

A sixth common mistake that you can make when giving feedback and coaching is not seeking feedback and coaching yourself. Feedback and coaching are not only for your coachees, but also for yourself. As a feedback giver and coach, you also need to improve your own skills, learn from your experiences, and achieve your own goals. If you do not seek feedback and coaching yourself, you may miss out on valuable insights, feedback, or opportunities to grow and develop. To avoid this pitfall, you should seek feedback and coaching from others who can help you enhance your communication skills, identify your strengths and areas for improvement, and support you in reaching your potential.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Amanda E. McCoy

Automated Admin Systems Consultant - Bringing HR into the 21st Century by using technology to automate systems, decrease administrative burdens, and create time for companies to focus on what really matters. people.
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Don’t be afraid to be outshined. Having an employee you coached take the limelight because they have done an exemplary job reflects positively on your management skills and elevates your success as a manager. Never take credit for work that has been done by someone under you, but exhibit that work so you can illuminate your own capabilities as a great coach and mentor. As always, a two way channel of communication is needed for any growth, but sometimes a win can help your employees gain the necessary confidence for healthy leadership. This will help your institution build a platform to cultivate its future management.

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Donjia G.

Frequency Specialist ~ Creator of SERENE SOUNDZ™ | Visionary in High Frequency BEING and BUSINESS | Quantum Consulting and Harmonizing Relaxation | Global Partnership Strategist
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Sharing the importance of alignment is key. Many coachee’s often mimic the success of others without truly tuning into their own niche, talent and timing. success extends beyond being a good student. Following the exact steps of a coach is important yet aligning with your authentic purpose and timing in sharing your knowledge, product or service is essential. Following through exactly as taught can go both ways. Absolute success is inevitable for those in vibrational alignment with their purpose in rhyming time and space. Even when working with the best of the best in coaching, what works for one is not guaranteed to bring success to another if the energy of effort and intention are not wholly aligned.

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What are some of the common pitfalls and mistakes to avoid when giving feedback and coaching?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Pitfall 1: Not clarifying the purpose and expectations

2 Pitfall 2: Not listening actively and empathetically

3 Pitfall 3: Not giving specific and balanced feedback

4 Pitfall 4: Not involving your coachee in the solution

5 Pitfall 5: Not following up and providing support

6 Pitfall 6: Not seeking feedback and coaching yourself

7 Here’s what else to consider

Interpersonal Communication

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What are some of the common pitfalls and mistakes to avoid when giving feedback and coaching?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Pitfall 1: Not clarifying the purpose and expectations

2 Pitfall 2: Not listening actively and empathetically

3 Pitfall 3: Not giving specific and balanced feedback

4 Pitfall 4: Not involving your coachee in the solution

5 Pitfall 5: Not following up and providing support

6 Pitfall 6: Not seeking feedback and coaching yourself

7 Here’s what else to consider

Interpersonal Communication

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