What do you do if your emotional intelligence is hindering your ability to connect with clients?

1 Assess your EI level

The first step to improve your EI is to know where you stand. You can take online tests or ask for feedback from your peers, managers, or mentors to get a sense of your strengths and weaknesses in EI. For example, you might be good at expressing your emotions, but not so good at regulating them. Or you might be good at reading others' emotions, but not so good at responding to them. Knowing your EI level can help you identify the areas you need to work on and the situations that trigger your emotional reactions.

2 Develop self-awareness and self-regulation

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize your own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors and how they affect your performance and relationships. Self-regulation is the ability to control your impulses, manage your stress, and adapt to changing circumstances. Both skills are essential for outside sales, as they help you cope with rejection, frustration, and uncertainty. To develop self-awareness and self-regulation, you can practice mindfulness, journaling, meditation, or breathing exercises. These techniques can help you calm your nerves, clear your mind, and focus on your goals.

3 Enhance social awareness and social skills

Social awareness is the ability to understand and empathize with others' emotions, needs, and perspectives. Social skills are the ability to communicate, collaborate, and influence others effectively. Both skills are vital for outside sales, as they help you build rapport, trust, and loyalty with your clients. To enhance social awareness and social skills, you can practice active listening, mirroring, asking open-ended questions, and giving feedback. These techniques can help you show interest, respect, and appreciation for your clients and their problems.

4 Balance empathy and assertiveness

Empathy is the ability to feel and share what others are feeling. Assertiveness is the ability to express your opinions, needs, and rights without violating those of others. Both qualities are important for outside sales, as they help you create win-win solutions, negotiate better deals, and handle objections. However, too much empathy can make you lose sight of your own interests, while too much assertiveness can make you appear aggressive or arrogant. To balance empathy and assertiveness, you can use the I-statements technique, which involves stating how you feel, what you want, and why you want it. This technique can help you convey your message without blaming, criticizing, or attacking your clients.

6 Practice and apply your EI skills

The last and most important step to improve your EI is to practice and apply your skills in real-life situations. You can use role-playing, simulations, or scenarios to rehearse your responses, reactions, and behaviors in different sales contexts. You can also use your daily interactions with your clients, prospects, and colleagues as opportunities to test and refine your EI skills. By practicing and applying your EI skills, you can boost your confidence, competence, and credibility as an outside sales professional.