What do you do if your boss's interests conflict with yours?

1. Understand the Situation: Thoroughly grasp the conflict's nature and impact. Don't make it about who is right or wrong.#Diplomacy 2. Communicate Openly: Address concerns 1:1 directly with your boss, focusing on impacts.#Transparency 3. Tact and Adapt: Align the results of your manager and your assessments (Myers Briggs, etc.) for tips toward collaborative success.#Finesse 4. Assess the Risks: Consider potential consequences for your relationship and career.#Safety 5. Choose Your Battles: Prioritize conflicts that affect work or org goals.#Zipit 6. Document Everything: Keep detailed records of relevant interactions for clarity and evidence.#CYA 7. Seek Allies: Align with coworkers to address conflicts and find common ground.#Collaboration

Motivational Interviewing is a technique developed to help people resolve ambivalent feelings to find the internal motivation they need to change their behavior. It's about guiding rather than directing, and listening as much as talking. When your interests clash with your boss's, using MI can help you explore both sides of the issue. You can express your perspective in a way that acknowledges your boss's stance, which can lead to a more open and productive dialogue. The goal is to reach a consensus that respects both parties' concerns and objectives.

Utilize Motivational Interviewing techniques to initially discern whether the goals and motivations of your superior align with those of the organization. If alignment is evident, consider employing MI to explore potential disparities in interests and motivations between yourself and your manager. This exploration may prompt a reassessment of your own interests to better align with the company culture, or potentially lead to a decision to seek alternative employment opportunities. Conversely, if the discord pertains to an individual rather than the company as a whole, employing Motivational Interviewing can facilitate constructive dialogue and enhance understanding of the situation.

Before you approach your boss, take time to understand the conflict. Reflect on how your interests differ from your boss's and why. This isn't about assigning blame but about clarifying the situation for yourself. By doing so, you're preparing to discuss the issue without becoming defensive or confrontational. Remember, your boss likely has reasons for their interests that seem just as valid to them as yours do to you. Recognizing this can set the stage for a respectful conversation.

Reflect on the outcomes of your discussions and look for opportunities to grow and improve your communication skills. See conflicts as chances to learn and develop a stronger working relationship.

regardless of the outcome, maintain respect for your boss throughout the process. Motivational Interviewing teaches that change is a process and sometimes takes time. If an immediate resolution isn't possible, express appreciation for the discussion and suggest revisiting the conversation later. This leaves the door open for future dialogue and demonstrates your commitment to a positive working relationship.

By putting Motivational Interviewing into practice when dealing with conflicts with your boss, you can foster a more positive and constructive working environment. With patience, empathy, and effective communication, you can navigate office tensions with grace and professionalism, paving the way for smoother interactions and better understanding in the workplace.